As a therapist who supports survivors of spiritual abuse, I want to honor the strength it takes to examine your experiences and begin the journey to healing, however that looks for you. Spiritual abuse is often insidious, disguised as care or leadership, and its effects can linger long after you’ve left the environment where it occurred.
You might be experiencing persistent fear and shame, showing up as intrusive thoughts about punishment or a relentless inner critic that says you’re never enough. Survivors may begin questioning their worth and their ability to reconnect with themselves and others.
This often leads to perfectionism, overworking, or even self-neglect as you strive to meet impossible expectations or standards set forth for you to follow. . This happens because spiritual abuse often teaches us to doubt ourselves and rely on external authority for validation. The consequences are far-reaching, including identity confusion; distrust of others; social isolation or anxiety over they didn’t see notice the signs of abuse sooner before more painful things happened
Spiritual abuse can strip away your sense of autonomy. You might feel disconnected from your intuition or struggle to make decisions without seeking approval from others.
Here are some common signs and symptoms of spiritual abuse that survivors have noticed they experience in religious or or non religious spiritual communities:
Fear and Shame: Anxiety, intrusive thoughts, harsh self-criticism, or feelings of unworthiness.
Rigid Moral Thinking: Black-and-white thinking, fear of questioning authority, and difficulty making independent decisions. Often intrusive thoughts struggling with the moral Right vs Wrong choice.
Self-Suppression: Hiding parts of yourself, difficulty identifying your emotions, or losing your sense of identity outside the group.
Social Challenges: Struggles with trusting others, setting boundaries, or forming healthy relationships. Fear of judgement by others, especially in the community.
Mental, Physical and Emotional Exhaustion: Overwork, physical symptoms of stress or a weakening immune system; a constant need to prove yourself; or hyperfocus on service to others or to the community over self care or personal priorities, like family and rest.
Healing begins with recognizing these patterns and reclaiming your voice. You deserve a life where your voice, boundaries, sense of self and identity are honored and respected. With support, you can rediscover trust in yourself and move toward a place of safety, empowerment and healing. You’re not alone in this journey— support is available.
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